Thursday, 3 November 2011

Fighting an uphill battle

Blog starts here

I had an appointment with my GP a few weeks ago to have some blood taken to test for vitamin/nutrient deficiencies. I got my results back Monday and I'm apparently deficient in vitamin D. No explanation as to what vitamin D does to the body (I had to google it!) and no explanation as to how or why this might have happened!

When they called me for my consult they just said to get some supplements from a local chemist or something and that's it! About 10 minutes later the nurse called back and asked me to come in for a face to face consultation with the doctor. I went in tonight and she basically told me NOTHING!

I asked many questions but apparently "We still don't know ourselves what these vitamins do to our bodies." Well... if you're the fucking doctor and cant tell me shit what hope do I have?! 

Also, the doctor I saw last time who was supposed to be speaking with my psychiatrist STILL hasn't spoken to her because she is "difficult to get hold of"!! 

I know... I'll just go to the surgery and take a knife to my wrists and maybe then they'll fucking listen?! 

What do I have to do to MAKE someone listen to me?! Any fucking wonder the statistics for suicide in mental health patients is so high?! 

I'm fortunate (or unfortunate, depends how you view it!) in that I don't cut to kill. I'm actually afraid of death and that's probably part of the reason I haven't yet killed myself! I'm also worried about how it would affect my friends and family! See...? always putting others first! 

Well, until next time,

Keep smiling :): 


  1. being afraid of death is also a reason i havent succesfully done it. i like to believe in reincarnating into someone better but im afraid that might not be the case and i might just not exist anymore. or worse.....................

  2. Yeah I know that feeling!! It's so hard.


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